40 Letters of Love: Dear Davis

Dear Davis,

12. It cannot be possible.

12 years ago, a beautiful, strong and wise boy was born.

12 years ago, you were born in a continent far away and your birth would change the lives of our family in ways that I never could have imagined.

12 years ago, your birth would be part of your dad and me discovering the world. Discovering the need to learn more about others. Discovering love in a way that feels as real as love can get. A beautiful, hard love.

This morning I spent some time looking back through pictures of our time together the past 10 years. There is nothing brighter on this earth than a Davis smile.

The year of 11 was a big one for you. You spent some concentrated time learning a little more about yourself, you had a major surgery and you grew and grew and grew. You started middle school and youth group. And you seem to be learning more about what makes you smile these days.

What is it I most want you to know at 12?

You are loved. There is nothing you could do to change that.

You are strong and brave. Your perseverance through the hard is a model for others.

You are gift. Our family would not be who we are without you.

We love you so.

Love,

Me

#40loveletters

Dear Color,

“I choose not to see you”, they say, as if this is some form of compliment to you.

“We are all the same”, they say, as if this will generate equal rights and undo years of oppression and systematic injustice.

“I just see people”, they want to believe, perhaps their bias unknown even to them.

Dear Color,

I used to think this was the way, the way of honoring sameness and equality. But now I see the path forward is to celebrate our difference.

Only recently did I begin to notice the evolution of spring in NC...First the purple Wisteria, then the bloom of the white Honeysuckle and Magnolia blossoms, to the vibrant variety of Hydrangea and the gift of the Mimosa Tree. How tragic if I had never noticed. What if I had not learned that each smell, each new bloom, each color of spring was an offering of beauty?

Dear Color,

Some deny you to repress. Others to try to unify.

I’d like to challenge those denying you for any reason, to start to notice instead. With each new color they see, each new person, they offer a prayer of gratitude and thanksgiving for your creation. For we are truly and wonderfully made.

Love,

Me

#40loveletters

“From day one, parents of every color should begin to celebrate color differences in the human spectrum instead of praising one over the other or even worse, pretending we’re all the same. Then, we could have a more public facing, cross-cultural dialogue about the more global problem of colorism and plot its necessary demise.” Lori L. Tharps, Time Magazine, 2016