@519 Church

Let your roots grow down into him and let your lives be built on him.

Colossians 2:7

519 (read 5 one 9) launched our first service this past Sunday. A year's worth of planning, dreaming and visioning finally began.

The thing that excites me most about 519 is that I believe it can be not just another church, but a church where our lives are built on Him.

Not just another church to go on Sunday with great music and a great message (though we are blessed that it will also be that), but a church where we learn to ask ourselves: 

What if we spent less, to give more?

What does love your neighbor really look like?

What if we spent time in relationship with the divine daily?

What if we valued that relationship above all else?

What if we saw the Holy in each encounter and in each person?

What if we loved well and lived differently?



Great Expectations

Expectation is the root of all heartache.

William Shakespeare

There has been a post floating around Facebook about 5 things to do To Be Happy that I have posted in my office:

1.       Free your heart from hatred.

2.       Free your mind from worry.

3.       Live Simply.

4.       Give more.

5.       Expect Less

Expect Less.

Ever have an event that didn’t turn out the way you had expected? Maybe you were looking forward to a good night sleep and one of your children had other plans. Maybe you planned a party and no one could come. Maybe you had blocked some time to finally complete that project at work, but 10 other things came up.  

Ever have someone or a group of people not behave the way you had expected?  Maybe you expected your children to behave in the grocery store. Maybe you expected people that claim something with their words to exhibit that in how they live. Maybe you were not expecting the criticism that came from the one you love. Maybe even you expected you to do better and yet you fell short. 

Ever have the church not feel like the church. Maybe people cared more about what kind of coffee was served than if the spirit was present. Maybe people cared more about how many people were in attendance on Sunday morning than how many people served others the rest of the week. Maybe you too fell into the trap of consumer church.

That’s where I’ve been living the past few days. And in living here, I have felt disappointed. I have felt sad. I have felt angry. And so I have wrestled with (am still wrestling with) the things/people causing these feelings…except I am realizing is not the people or the events themselves.  It is the expectations around them. And I keep coming back to this…My ego is damaged when my expectations aren’t met.

This doesn’t mean that I don’t think that we should desire good behavior from our children, kindness from those that love us, for the church to take what Jesus said seriously, and to strive for personal improvement. But I believe it does mean that it can’t be about us and our individual expectations. It has to be greater than that. Instead of expectations that lead to disappointment, sadness and anger, I want to choose Hope. Hope for myself. Hope for others. Hope in the spirit that leads to love, to joy, to peace, and to kindness.

So for me, right now, Loving Well and Living Differently means choosing hope over expectation.

Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him.

Psalm 62:5

BeCome the Light

Everything exposed to the light itself becomes light.

Ephesians 5:13

Jimmy and I have started a new group at our church called Fruit of the Spirit. This class involves listening to scripture and asking the Spirit to speak to you. It is not a Bible study in the traditional sense, but a way to engage with the divine. It requires you to listen in prayer rather than talking in prayer. I have written before that I do believe prayer is less about asking and more about listening, but that is easier said than done. And get ready for it…we listen for 10 to 15 minutes!!! If you are thinking this is not a long time, you are either already great at meditation or have never tried this. If you are the latter…go ahead and pause reading, set a timer for 10 minutes, and try it. Hard, right?

The first week I wasn’t feeling so well and felt pressure to ‘hear from God’. The scripture was John 3:16-21,

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him…But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God.

All that I kept hearing was, “Come into the light”. Again and Again. For 10 minutes. “OK God, Come into the light. Got it. Could I get something more?” With only those 4 words, I didn’t have much to write in my journal or share with the group. It wasn’t until later, when reading the scripture again, I saw that while I heard “Come into the light” the scripture actually says “Comes into the light”. Just one little sound missing, but I wondered if it were significant.

I have been trying lately to really focus on the present moment, to think of each person in my day as a child of God, and express God’s love for them. This is not always easy. In fact, it is usually hard. Other people can be hurtful. Other people can demand our attention at a time we feel we have little to give. And let’s face it, some people’s personalities just don’t jive with our own.

Jimmy and I recently went on a cruise. At first I had a hard time adjusting to such abundance (A problem I have never had on a cruise before. If only I had continued to live in ignorance of the way most people in the world live. Jimmy and I joked about our “First world problems”. “My ice is melting out by the pool before I can finish my drink.” “Yeah, well I can’t decide if I want to get another mushroom pizza or go to the Mongolian Grill”.) However, I knew that this was much needed time for Jimmy and me to relax and spend some time with each other. So on the second day during my quiet time, I made the commitment to try to smile and show love to each person I came into contact with the rest of the trip. This included a whole lot of people that I didn’t know. Instead of judging these strangers, I tried to love them. I was not always successful, but in trying to show love to others I felt God’s love and presence with me. By trying to be God’s light, I felt God’s light.

I alone can’t be the light. It is just not possible. I am human. I make mistakes. I get angry. I get frustrated. I judge others. But thankfully, it is not my light. The light is Always there. He will be the light through me, if I come to Him.

Even in darkness, light dawns. Psalm 112:4

One of my favorite groups right now is Addison Road. I love their version of This Little Light of Mine.

“There’s a little flame inside us all. Some shine bright, some shine small. The rains will come and the waters rise, but don’t you ever lose your light. In this life you will know, love and pain, joy and sorrow. So when it hurts, when times get hard, don’t forget whose child you are.”

When we feel we have lost the light, it is still there because we are children of God. How awesome is that! What if we all shined His light? What if we all tried to love more and judge less? What would our lives look like? Gosh, what would our Facebook news feeds look like?