Great Expectations

Expectation is the root of all heartache.

William Shakespeare

There has been a post floating around Facebook about 5 things to do To Be Happy that I have posted in my office:

1.       Free your heart from hatred.

2.       Free your mind from worry.

3.       Live Simply.

4.       Give more.

5.       Expect Less

Expect Less.

Ever have an event that didn’t turn out the way you had expected? Maybe you were looking forward to a good night sleep and one of your children had other plans. Maybe you planned a party and no one could come. Maybe you had blocked some time to finally complete that project at work, but 10 other things came up.  

Ever have someone or a group of people not behave the way you had expected?  Maybe you expected your children to behave in the grocery store. Maybe you expected people that claim something with their words to exhibit that in how they live. Maybe you were not expecting the criticism that came from the one you love. Maybe even you expected you to do better and yet you fell short. 

Ever have the church not feel like the church. Maybe people cared more about what kind of coffee was served than if the spirit was present. Maybe people cared more about how many people were in attendance on Sunday morning than how many people served others the rest of the week. Maybe you too fell into the trap of consumer church.

That’s where I’ve been living the past few days. And in living here, I have felt disappointed. I have felt sad. I have felt angry. And so I have wrestled with (am still wrestling with) the things/people causing these feelings…except I am realizing is not the people or the events themselves.  It is the expectations around them. And I keep coming back to this…My ego is damaged when my expectations aren’t met.

This doesn’t mean that I don’t think that we should desire good behavior from our children, kindness from those that love us, for the church to take what Jesus said seriously, and to strive for personal improvement. But I believe it does mean that it can’t be about us and our individual expectations. It has to be greater than that. Instead of expectations that lead to disappointment, sadness and anger, I want to choose Hope. Hope for myself. Hope for others. Hope in the spirit that leads to love, to joy, to peace, and to kindness.

So for me, right now, Loving Well and Living Differently means choosing hope over expectation.

Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him.

Psalm 62:5